Not long ago, I was watching a television program where the topic was forgiveness. Like many talk shows, there was a panel of individuals, the host, psychologists and mental health experts to provide their expertise to the aggrieved group of men who had been hurt or betrayed by another person.

Accounts of child abuse, infidelity, attempted rape, violence, financial theft, cold and distant fathers, abandonment at youth, etc were among the stories recounted from the men as they either exposed or dredged up unpleasant memories that had occurred at some point in their lives. One caught his wife in bed with his so-called best friend. Another was the victim of sexual abuse at the hands of an older relative.

As one can imagine, some of these stories were difficult to listen to. Truth be told, any reasonable person could understand why the victims of such vile transgressions at the hands of unscrupulous human beings would be unable or unwilling to forgive such atrocious behavior. This is where the psychologists and specialists stepped in.

Each mental health expert made the case, in varied terms, that it was crucial for each of these individuals to make a valiant effort to reach a level of peace from what had occurred in their lives. Not toward the perpetrators of such misdeeds, but rather, for their own physical and mental health. Interestingly, the majority of guys did not contest the advice given to them. They agreed that taking such an approach was likely to be the most effective path as they attempted to navigate through their personal dilemmas.